fast post: 4th of july 3 day weekend. yess!

here comes a fast post. i am in the middle of a fabulous 4th of july 3 day weekend. this fabulous weekend has so far consisted of: 

- me missing my boyfriend terribly. I'm so very angsty. Just kidding about the second part.

- dog-sitting for family friends. they have a pool and 3 cuuute deeogies.

- lots of phone conversations pool-side though it's strangely mild weather - only 70 degrees outside. = no swimming.

- passion pit playing over and over and over again my car (it's good summer stuff, gearing me up for Lollapalooza.)

- really loving psalm 84. been reading and meditating and re-reading it (the repetition is like unto passion pit). But especially the part when it speaks of those who are strong in the Lord going on a pilgrimage. And through the pilgrimage passing through the Valley of Baca (Weeping). But then, amazingly, turning the valley into springs and pools and good stuff. All concluding in then meeting God in Zion... I love how our journey with God is never quite what we expect. Though the destination is often veiled (hello, unseen God), by faith we believe in the resurrection and cultivation of our lives in Christ when He appears, or when we meet Him, which ever happens to come first.... more on this later.

-  my friend Lindsay came back into town. She's been gone for the summer riding horses and helping troubled teenage girls. We ate Indian food today with friends. I tried it all. Very tasty stuff. Particularly the fried cauliflower. 

- fireworks with Asian exchange students at their teacher's house, which happens to be my friend Phil. We had lovely conversation about God and discipleship in between loud firecrackers.

- watering my orchid friend. it's going well so far, it's not dead yet.

- practicing electric guitar. this proves to be difficult. scales for a little bit each day. should be longer. i have a long way to go.

okay, that's tidbits from me for now. 

sigur ros birthday email

nýja lagið from sigur-ros.co.uk on Vimeo.

I got a little birthday email from Sigur Ros last week. It's a clip from a show from 1999 in the Iceland Opera house. Enjoy

birfweek 2009 - turning 27

birthday was yesterday. it's been the best birfweek ever.
highlights: 1. a going away party for Arin/birthday party for myself and our wonderful friend Nikki. Pretty Ugly (Arin's band) played along with Fontee Fount (some total hipster friends from Springfield that moved to Washington) in the comfort of 95 degree heat, lots and lots of people, and all in Arin's living room. There were memories as good friends parted ways, tears shed, and a whole lot of dancing. I for one couldn't believe that there were such great bands playing at my birthday party. You should have seen my goofy grin after I got over my party anxiety (after all, I am an introvert) and realized the greatness of what was happening... 2. I have a new toy. I am now the happy owner of one Fender Telecaster electric guitar thanks to Arin. Happiest of birthday's to me. :) Now I just have to learn how to be good at the guitar... 3. Spent my birthday with my mom and sister at the pool. Lovely. It actually rained for the first time in two weeks. 4. Dinner party with best friends included summer melon soup, apricot stuffed pork tenderloin, squash salad, green bean salad, and a sweet and salty cake with Askinosie chocolate and sea salt. It was birthday party in my mouth...
4. I'm in love. Everything that is coming out of my mouth right now is just too chipper for normal. I'm a mess. Love love love love. Yep.
Enjoy the pictures.

a quote from one wise woman.

"Remember to always elevate your faith above your feelings. Why? Because that which you elevate highly will govern you. Feelings change, but the precepts of faith are unchanging. Feelings change, but truth changes you. Always allow yourself to be governed by that which is eternal rather than that which is so temporary.
"For we walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Cor 5:7
Never allow your life circumstances to define you. Instead, let them refine you. Hard things are like heavenly sandpaper on your life. God uses them to shape and mold you into a work of art. When you feel the pressure of trials, remember that God won't allow them to crush you; He intends for them to make you beautiful. (2 Cor 4:8-9)
Always exercise courage even when you don't feel confident. Courage is a choice; confidence is a feeling. Remember that courage and confidence are not the same thing. Be brave, for bravery broadens you. Fear limits you.
Ask God to help you overcome earthly fear by developing reverence for Him. The only fear that brings you wisdom is the fear of God. Fear Him, reverence Him, and nothing else will shake you."

- Jennifer Rothschild

blogger or wordpress?

on the wordpress vs. blogger thing
I think due to Wordpress's inability to put widgets/javascript/html (whatever you call it) on the blog, I may stick with blogger. I know it's not good to be fickle on such things - but for now you have options if you read my blog - blogger or wordpress...I'll keep posting on both of them until I decide what I want to do.
on the whole life thing...
it's good.

the end.

Forever Young

Today was Arin's mom's funeral. Despite it being a classic un-happy occasion it was a beautiful day. Lots of friends, family, and good moments today in spite of hard circumstances (as you can see from the pictures - also a good moment: walking with friends down the Joplin streets after the reception tonight).
One of my favorite moments of the day was on my way home from Joplin tonight. I was driving back by myself under a green sky of thunderstorms and therefore had my radio on to listen for the weather...something that I try hard not to do (not a big radio fan). So I was listening to the classics on good ole 105.1 and Rod Stewart's Forever Young came on the radio. Now, I have never really been into Rod but beautiful Miss Linda Gilbert was (Rod and the amazing, the talented - Michael Bolton... Believe it or not she was something close to the founder or leader of the Michael Bolton fan club! She LOOOVED Rod and Michael). Anyway, she particularily loved the song Forever Young. So when it came on the radio as I was driving home, I pumped it up and called Arin and sang it to him on his voicemail.
Ha! It actually made me cry after I got off the phone because the lyrics were so perfect. So here's the lyrics and here's to you Linda! I will miss you and am going to buy a Rod Stewart's greatest hits album (not sure if I can do Michael Bolton) as soon as I can...

May the good lord be with you
Down every road you roam
And may sunshine and happiness
Surround you when youre far from home
And may you grow to be proud
Dignified and true
And do unto others
As youd have done to you
Be courageous and be brave
And in my heart youll always stay
Forever young, forever young
Forever young, forever young

May good fortune be with you
May your guiding light be strong
Build a stairway to heaven
With a prince or a vagabond

And may you never love in vain
And in my heart you will remain
Forever young, forever young
Forever young, forever young
Forever young
Forever young

And when you finally fly away
Ill be hoping that I served you well
For all the wisdom of a lifetime
No one can ever tell

But whatever road you choose
Im right behind you, win or lose
Forever young, forever young
Forever young ,forever young
Forever young, forever young
For, forever young, forever young

keep reaching for the invisible God.

"I will abide in your tabernacle forever; I will trust in the shelter of Your wings. For You, O God, have heard my vows. You have given me a heritage of those who fear Your name." Ps 61:4-5

This verse makes me think of what it means to trust as a Christian. It also makes me think of the people who make up the house of prayer and what it means to be a priest. (and let me be clear, when I say priest I don't necessarily mean men that live celibate lives and wear white collars. I also don't only mean those that are on full time staff at houses of prayer) It makes me think of those that go into prayer rooms or prayer closets, day in and day out, rain or shine, tough or easy, to worship God. And not just the people who pray now, but the people who stayed and prayed in generations past. The Annas. The Stephens. The odd balls. The weird flag ladies. The old testament priests who had to deal with all that nasty, sticky, blood. The ones who haven't yet stood on the wall of their hearts continually but will. And the ones that are standing now in churches and prayer rooms and prayer closets across the world that are paying their vows. Abiding in the tabernacle. Trusting only in the shelter of His wings. 

Because to God, prayer and worship are important. A priest in my mind is anyone who stands before God on behalf of men. Praying and worshipping, asking for God His will to be done on earth as it is in heaven...And to God, that's really important. 

It must be said that the Christian life, whatever it looks like, it isn't exactly easy. To worship and trust in an invisible God and invisible wings is harder sometimes than to trust in the things that are seen. Anyone that trusts in God for outcomes related to life in general, experiences the pains of a sovereign God who happens to also be invisible, and lets face it, a lot of the times, silent too. To trust means to put fate in someone else's hands. It's to give up control and lean on an unseen outcome at the ability of someone else to preform it. And it isn't easy when the One you are trusting is A. a crazy leader and is B. invisible... 

Trust is faith put into motion. We all know of it. We all experience it if we are believers...

Those who give up their lives to abide in the tabernacle, to trust in the shelter of invisible wings, truly hear their vows ringing in their own ears. (For You, O God, have heard my vows...and I would add, "and so have I!") Day after day waking up wondering if it is really worth it because it is UNSEEN. it is a life of TRUST. it is FAILING to rely on our own strength on purpose. 

I guess what I am saying is two things have been on my heart to pray for the past few months: 

1. The burden to pray for those that are truly trusting in an invisible and often silent good God for outcomes beyond their control. 

2. The burden to pray for the prayer movement and for those who do it continually to truly see their purpose- to stand before God on the behalf of men. I'm praying that they would be strengthened in their hearts to continue to give it all because He's worth it. To be living sacrifices that I believe strengthen the rest of the Body of Christ into deeper levels of trust and commitment to the Lord. 

To my friends at ZHOP and elsewhere: keep going. He's worth it. You are too.

To my friends who are really needing to see God's goodness: Keep going. He's good. He's trustworthy and hears the cries of Your heart.

sad week

Arin's mom passed away yesterday around 10:30am. 

It's been quite a week. Pray for the Gilbert family. 

Thank you.